Ask Asad: I made a mistake and it may have ruined my career. Please help

Dear Asad,

I am a 25-year-old woman who’s feeling down and depressed. I am going through a tough time and need some guidance.

I was working as a HR officer in a big hotel industry and was doing really well. I was happy with my work and used to stay busy all the time. But there was one negative aspect of it – my boss. He apparently was a nice guy but he used to shout at me all the time and that too over non-issues and in front of everyone in the office. Initially I used to take this in my stride and did not let it affect the quality of my work. But one day he shouted at me like an animal – it was terrible. I couldn’t take it anymore and quit my job just after being in the company for five months.

I found another job with a good salary and title. But the problem is that in comparison with my former company, where I was responsible for over 500 employees, this company is quite small and low profile. I don’t like anything at my current workplace. I find it all too dull; the work, the workplace and the people. 

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I feel I made a huge mistake in switching jobs so soon and that too from a high profile company to a low profile one. This has led me to feel anxious all the time. I feel nervous and have lost confidence. My pulse rate has gone up to a 100. I keep on telling myself that I won’t ever get a chance to be in a high profile company again and thus my career is ruined.

After work I just come home and lie down. I don’t involve myself in any activities, physical or otherwise. I start crying over nothing and now I also have nightmares. And on top of all this I was also dumped by a guy who, it turned out, was not serious about our relationship. This happened right after I switched my job.

I visited a psychiatrist without informing my family. He asked me to control my negative thoughts, not stress over issues and also prescribed some medicines. Though my situation is quite bad, and what the psychiatrist said made sense, but still I don’t want to be on medication. I want to control things on my own. But I don’t know how to do it. Please help me get out of this phase where I regret everything.

Regretful woman


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Warning: If you keep on thinking of your current company and job as being inferior to your previous one, then that might lead you to underperform. This in turn will negatively affect your chances of securing a position in a better company in the future.

As for the guy who dumped you, believe me you are better off without him. He left you when you needed him the most – after switching your job, when you were miserable. If he couldn’t bear to be with you at your time of need and left you as soon as a crisis hit, then he definitely is not the type of guy you should be thinking of making a life with.


Asad is a counsellor, life coach, inspirational speaker and a personal-development expert. He advises on social, personal and emotional issues. You can send him your questions for this weekly column at [email protected] with “Ask Asad” mentioned in the subject line and provide as many details as possible.

Note: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Express Tribune.

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